


How Many Times?

by ShamelessHo (EeeGee)



Category: Shameless (TV), Shameless (US)
Genre: Angst, Ficlet, M/M, Season 3, Spoilers, mention of rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-10
Updated: 2013-06-10
Packaged: 2017-12-14 13:52:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/837624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EeeGee/pseuds/ShamelessHo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mickey has never said no to Ian. He's said a lot of words that an outside observer might say was tantamount to the same thing, but he’s never flat out said “no.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	How Many Times?

**Author's Note:**

> NB: This is what I envision Ian thinking about Mickey, not my opinions of Mickey.

Mickey has never said no to Ian. He's said a lot of words that an outside observer might say was tantamount to the same thing, but he’s never flat out said “no.” So as far as Ian is concerned they don’t count.

Ian knows it would be easier if he just did.

He’s convinced himself that although Mickey keeps him at arms’ length, keeps telling him “not now” or “I can’t”, and even that one gut-wrenching time, “done is done”, that he actually means the opposite. He’s convinced of Mickey’s feelings, and until he actually hears the word “No” come out of Mickey’s mouth there’s nothing to stop them.

* * *

 

During sex, Mickey is always the noisy one.

Ian is quiet, but Mickey likes to give the orders.

“Turn over. Harder.  Let me... I want... There.  Give... _Please_.”  And finally, usually desperately, “Get in me.”

If he’s lucky, Ian is rewarded with a hiss of his name as Mickey comes too. Sometimes even his first name. But Mickey never says “no.” Not to anything.

He didn’t say “no” to his father either when he caught them. He said “Stop.” He said “Wait.” He said “Get the fuck off of him!” but when it came down to it, he didn’t say “no”.

 

Or when that whore came calling round. To be fair there was a gun involved, but if there wasn’t? Would he? Could he?

* * *

When Ian found out that Mickey was getting married, he should have known that confrontation was the wrong thing, but he had to do something. Had to _say_ something.

“You love me. You’re gay. Can’t you just admit it? Just this once?”

Direct questions, right to his face and _still_ Mickey hadn’t said “no.” Instead his answer was to beat Ian to a pulp instead.

 

Ian had gone home and cried. Not because Mickey had hit him - he was used to the fists. The bruises on his skin and the tears in his flesh that just meant Mickey didn’t know what else to do, how else to express himself and so he let his hands do the talking. Ian cried because he knew he was losing Mickey again. That Terry was winning and Mickey was letting him. That he didn’t have the stones to stand up to his father. To say “No. No, dad. I love him. Don’t make me do this.”

* * *

Ian has an epiphany. Maybe he’s being too forceful? Maybe he should _help_ Mickey. He just needs moral support, that’s all. He decides to go to Mickey. Make him realise how he feels. Make him stop the wedding.

“If you give half a shit about me,” Ian says “don’t do this.”

And Mickey kisses him for only the second time but it feels like forever, and Ian’s heart is pounding as he’s bending Mickey back over the sink, and not because they’re about to have sex, but because this might actually mean something. Maybe Mickey is giving them a chance.

 

But afterwards, it’s as if nothing has changed. Mickey isn’t saying “no” to his dad. He’s saying “I do” to the Russian whore that raped him. 

* * *

Ian’s mind is made up now. He’s running away, but he can’t stay here and watch Mickey play house anymore.

He’s still not old enough yet, but there’s a place that’ll make the fake ID for him and they’re good – the army won’t question it. _They_ won’t say “no” to him either.

And when Lip asks him – and it _will_ be Lip because he’s intuitive and because nobody else has even noticed that there’s been anything wrong – Ian’ll tell him.

“How many times you gotta hear no, right?” But inside he knows the answer.

Just once.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sure Mickey has said the word "no" to Ian at some point but for the sake of this ficlet, he has not ;-)
> 
> Hope you enjoyed. Thank you for reading.


End file.
